a season to remember

blog pic

What a beautiful season Christmas is.  The snow.  The lights.  The music.  The people.  Jesus.

This season is also one where people reflect.  On life.  On blessings.  But also on loss.  The holidays bring up a certain reminder that there are people in our lives that are gone.  That will not be celebrating this beautiful season with us.

Today is my day to remember.

I was watching my two precious girls running down the hall and my eyes filled up with tears.  My other precious little girl is not here.  And I miss her. I so wish that I could have her for one Christmas.  I will never forget holding her, loving her. I loved every second.  I hold each memory as a precious gift.  I am forever changed by the blessing of the time I got to be her mommy.

I remember my Nonnie, my moms mom.  What a wonderful women she was.  It is still so hard to believe that she is gone.  Up in heaven celebrating the birth of Our Lord in person with Him.  But today, I miss her. She loved me so much.  She always believed in me.  She was one of my biggest cheerleaders.  She was an example to me of how to love people well.  How to be selfless.  She enriched my children’s lives by the love she poured out for them.  And, wow, did she love Jesus.   I could go on and on and on and on.   The memories that I hold in my heart are some of my greatest treasures.  The legacy that she left is one of my greatest gifts.  Nonnie, we miss you.  Thank you for the precious memories and the legacy of faith that you left.  Enjoy celebrating the birth of Jesus while sitting in His presence.

Inside your heart, there is a special spot that will forever belong to them and only them.  That sport starts out as an empty hole.  A painful reminder of what was lost.  But as God brings healing, He allows the emptiness to be filled with memories.  Wonderful memories of that loved one we lost.  The healing part takes time and the once empty spot still contains a certain amount of tenderness.  And it can start to hurt at any moment for any reason. The holidays usually hit that tender spot, reminding us of the joyous memories while also binging to our attention that we miss them and that they are not here.   And this leads to reflection.  Often times tears.  I used to wish it didn’t hurt, that I would stop crying.  But now I believe that each tear I cry and each time I remember so deeply to where I feel it with my whole heart, I am honoring them.  I am remembering the person that they were and the impact that they had on my life.

This is a season to remember.



Thanksgiving Every Day

um, yes please!!!  I love Thanksgiving!  Family time, good food, lots of laughs.  I love the way Thanksgiving and the days leading up to it makes me feel.  It’s the best!

I recently wrote a post about being thankful.  This time of year we tend to reflect on all the things that we are thankful for.  We tend to compassionately notice those who go without.

But what if we chose to live in a state of thankfulness always.  Every day.  No matter what.  We took on a Thanksgiving mindset.  I truly believe we would have more Joy.  We would focus on all that we do have and not on what we don’t.  We would give to those in need more regularly just as we tend to do this time of year.

Why?  Because when we are thankful and take the time to count our blessings, it is hard not to be joyful.  It is hard to miss the needs of those around us.

True thanksgiving pours out of our hearts.  It turns into praise, joy and giving.

That is something that I want every day.  I want to create new habits.  Not just thank the Lord for my blessed life but really be thankful.

I can say that I am so thankful for my children.  And I am.  Very.  But there are days..You know “one of those days” where I am just trying to get through it.  On those days I certainly don’t have a heart of thanksgiving.  I don’t thank God for the mess and chaos those days bring.  But I want to.  It’s part of raising children.  There are good days and there are days that aren’t as good.  I want to thank The Lord even for those days.  Because even those days are such a reminder that I am blessed.


You are my everything


Lord in those moments of weakness, You are strong.

In those moment when I am lost, You find me.

When I fall, You pick me up.

Those times I cry, You comfort me.

When it is TOO MUCH, You are all I need.

In those times of hurt, You bring healing.

When I feel alone, You are there.

Your my comforter.  My Rock.  My protector.  My strength.  Lord, You are my everything.



Thankful! I’m thankful for so many things…. Mostly I am thankful for hope, faith, love and new life found in Jesus Christ. I am thankful that I’m forgiven. That I’m loved. That God never leaves me. That I have purpose in this life. I’m thankful that life is about so much more then me. I’m thankful that no matter how many times I fall, God picks me back up. He uses my brokenness. He heals my wounds. So yes, I’m thankful for the trials. The hard times we have faced. Because those times have made me who I am. They have refined me. Helped define me. Those times have drawn me closer to God.

I’m thankful for my family. My husband is the love of my life. He is my rock. He knows me so well and loves me with all his heart – even though he knows me so well 🙂 I’m thankful that he is who he is to me and our precious children. I’m thankful that he loves God.  I’m thankful that he and I have many similar interests.  I’m thankful he has been there holding my hand through life’s precious moments and life’s challenging heartbreaking ones. I’m so blessed to be his wife in this exciting crazy life we share!!!

I’m thankful that I’m a mommy.  Our precious daughters are amazing.  I’m thankful they love me so much and that I have the privilege to be their mom.  I’m thankful I get to watch them grow up and help them learn and that I get to learn from them. They bring so much joy to our lives. Their laughter fills our home every day.  They are our biggest blessings!   I’m thankful!

What are you thankful for this year?


Lord, I need You

Lord I need you!

I need you to guide me. Direct me. Lord, I feel like your doing a work in me. And two emotions come to mind for me. I’m excited & nervous. Because I know growth and change comes from hard work. Im all about working hard but it’s when the heart is challenged that it gets real hard. And right now I have felt as if I can’t seem to get my head above water. I’m uncomfortable. Stirred up. Wrestles. Lord, I feel that when I try to do something you have clearly called me to, distractions are thrown at me. Life gets busier. And it’s already busy. So busier just means crazy. Help me Lord to put everything aside and make more time for You!

We are here for one reason and that is to bring glory to You. To live for You. To make an impact on this world. Lord, You are bigger then anything I face in this life. And You will give me strength to be everything You call me to be. Lord strengthen me. Give me peace & joy that only come from You. I want my life to have a greater meaning and purpose then I can create. I want it to come from You. Lord, change my heart. Make me more like You. Make me brave and courageous to do what it is You have called me to do.

Thank you Lord for loving me. And for holding my hand through trying & chaotic times. Thank You for molding me and changing my heart. I completely, fully trust You with all that I am. I am willing to do what You call me to do knowing that it probably won’t be easy. Anything worth while usually isn’t.

Lord, I need You!
I love you!


Do you ever feel this way? Like God has called you to do something but life’s distractions keep you from doing it? I’d love to hear from you.

bust busy busy

Life. Life is so busy. Ever feel like you can’t catch your breath because your so busy? But then when you look at your life you feel like there isn’t anything you can give up?

Today is one if those days for me. Okay, to be honest, it’s been that way for several weeks. I’m trying to keep in mind that a new school year has begun. And with that comes more responsibilities and commitments. A lot more in fact.

My mom has always told me that everyone has the same amount of time in the day. We just all choose to use it differently. That statement usually comes as a gentle reminder when I am telling her that I’m too busy to write. Just too busy for certain things I want to do. It makes me stop and ask the question, what am I busy doing? Well, you know, homeschool, laundry, massage just to name a few things. My days fill up. But then if I really give it a lot of thought I can add things like Facebook, planning my life (which needs to be done but perhaps not to the level I do it), and the list of random things can keep going. My point is that I need to be using my time wisely. All of it. And I can tell you that I do not always use my time wisely.

I want to read. I want to blog. I want to spend more time in the word of God. What is stopping me? That is a good question. And it is one I’m going to find the answer to. I’m going to start paying close attention to how I spend my time. Without, of course, spending too much time doing that! 🙂

I want my time to matter. My days to be productive. I want to have time for what really matters and dismiss the things in life that don’t.

What do you do that helps you manage your time? What are some of the little things that you let go of in order to make more time for the things that really matter?

Lord, I pray that the things I do glorify You. Please help me to use my time wisely. To make time for the things that I should be doing. Help me not to waste time. Guide and direct my days. I want to dedicate each day to You and allow You to be the keeper of my time.

I am busy. That much is true. But I want God to get glory in all that I do. 🙂


Let them see You in me

There is a song called “Let them see you in me” by Colton Dixon. If you have not heard it, listen to it. Take in all the words. It’s beautiful. It can be applied to so many areas of life. I have applied it to parenting. It’s my theme song as a mom 🙂 Every time I hear the song I am reminded of just how much I desire for my children to see Jesus in me.

My last blog post was a day when parenting was hard. When I felt defeated. But on those days I am always challenged to look inside my own heart. To ask myself if during those hard days my children see Him in me.  I wrote that post because days like that are real. Parenting is not easy.

Lately, I have felt in a bit of a rut. A place where frustration has been my reaction to a hard day. Acting in frustration is acting in such a way that does not show my children the love of Christ. They mess up. They act out. They are children. They are learning. And being molded. The best way I can help mold my children into who The Lord wants them to be is going to be loving them with all my heart. No matter what the day brings. It’s going to mean setting aside myself for the sake of my children. And it is through that I am truly able to teach them how to respond when the day is not going well. How we are to act when we are frustrated. My kids look to me for so many things. For how to respond in most situations. That is so incredibly humbling. It’s a hard job. But it’s also an honor. And it’s a calling that I want to take very seriously.

I pray that as I seek The Lord in my parenting journey that I would be changed. That I would always be teachable. And that God would live in and thorough me. I will never have it down perfectly. But I will never stop trying.  I want what comes out of my mouth and I want my actions to be such that my children see Jesus in me.